a blind ghost locked in a cage.
it's as if the mirage that glimmers right beyond her glimpse
mocks her, teases her, hinting her to shout
so she prepares, she straps back her gloves
she hooks a strand of hazelnut hair behind her ear
and looking up at the sky, she almost kisses the air
her hands shooting like firecrackers by her side, and she's ready
"i'm ready," she yells, she whispers, she calls to whatever deaf one that hears.
she closes her eyes and within one second of prosperity.
within that one second where the gravitational pull swoops her back down
she parts her lips, swallows and uses her voices
until she realizes, she's mute. i'm the only one that listens.

picture yourself in a boat on a river
with tangerine trees and marmalade skies
somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly
a girl with kaleidoscope eyes
cellophane flowers of yellow and green
towering over your head
look for a girl with the sun in her eyes and she's gone

everybody could use somebody. lots of people trust me, and i only trust a couple. it's like everybody thinks that it's a race to get enough people to spill their secrets and listen to all the gossip everywhere. it's not a race. instead of racing for many, while don't you race for few? why don't you race for yourself to be appreciated, or for yourself to be respected? you're too busy trying to respect people that you barely have enough people respecting you as an individual. someone once told me, "in order to be special to someone, you must be special to yourself first." learn to raise your chin, and go out by yourself. be able to actually understand and analyze what you've done wrong, what mistakes you've made, before you point out the flaws and faults of others. because by the time you realize you're able to recognize yourself before recognizing others, you realize that you don't have time to talk about flaws or point fingers. because by then, you're you, and you've grown up. when will you grow tired of playing games, when you're the one loosing? when you're the one in the game itself?
__________________________________________________________
what if there's a connected mind to yours. what if when you're dreaming, someone is actually living those actions in that moment and vice versa?

if you could make me remember, and i cry the same tears that i thought i left behind, you must be something special.

christopher drew is so adorable. one of my favorite songs by him is "on the brightside." and another one would probably be "did it hurt?" his songs are so cute and their simple, straightforward and basically all his songs are one or two instruments and his voice. "did you know, did you know, it was love from the first time we touched." another band like nevershoutnever is owl city, very simple and cute. songs that i like by owl city are rainbow veins, vanilla twilight and umbrella beach. i think i might want to go to the john mayer concert on feb 25-26(: soundss funn. anyways, 2010 goals are to improve all my grades in all my subjects, and study hard without any lack of concentration:]

     

stillness between two hands.

r.i.p cousin maria patico. maria patricia bustamante 12/25/09

and i'll be praying for you manuelita.

"when you walked through the door, it was clear to me."

pulled an all nighter basically last night with my friends sarah and shiraz. we watched mirrors, the scary movie and actually it was amazingly scary. at one point, sarah had lost her phone and shiraz called her phone and sarah's starting lighting up in the corner. sarah and shiraz were being all paranoid and starting screaming while i was basically hiding behind them trying not to look at the phone. anyways, it was a fun night and now sarah's a gay 15 year old.

happy birthday baby sarah

!

don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there's a whole universe beyond that. it's when you travel back in time when you realize you should hit the back button or maybe continue into the future. and it's only when you see something, touch something or hear something that you realize you remember one still memory that in fact you notice you've forgotten. we're trained to do then finish. because, upon looking back, you make irrational decisions. but what if you don't want to forget, nor continue. what if you'd like to do both? shouldn't there be betweenness? and what if it's not you, the one that's traveling faster through decades than you could ever imagine? what if it's your memories? what if their happening so fast, that instead, you have no control? and that's when i think, there's no point of finding those time traveling machines, or anything unnatural. because, the only thing natural to do now is to just stay in between.

lovers love , liars lie.

but the sky turned red that day.

status nowadays: just don't ask me how i am.

how does it feel to be in heaven at night? its finally the winter break but it doesn't feel like it. it just feels like an extended weekend... christmas isn't even being spread around nyc. don't even feel like pulling my all nighters, 12 oclock seems just right forrr me. the only winter spirit thats going down around here is the snow. snowballs, snowflakes, good laughs:)

i think i'll try defying gravity.

this week's obsession for me = glee. the gleeeeeee cast is amazing and their voices whoa:)

this is the second and last week of exam yaaaay. i hope i ace my history and biology exams.

lots of new decisions to be made over this break.

plans.

solutions.

2 steps back, 5 steps forward.

i'll bet on it.

tu me fais sentir heureuse.

why did i change the pace

hearts were never meant to race

always felt the need for space

and now i can't reach your face

so where are you standing now

are you in the crowd of my voice

love can't you see my hand

lend me one more chance

we can still have it all

-chrisbrown "crawl"

The Ignored

the golden night

swarms beside me

as a puddle at first

and then it alters

into the everlasting

ride of inspiration

i wanna wrap the world in love over and over again.

what do you say, we leave to California?

no one has to know if we decide to go.

and i'll swim the ocean for you. the ocean for you. (: i am listening to one of my fave bands that i actually forgot about for a while and i think i'm gonna obsess about it again. kelsey by METRO STATION. their songs are actually adorable. yesterday i watched new moon. what a disappointment but because i'm a sucker for these books i kinda loved it even though it was terrible. it was funny because while we were waiting to go into the theatre, we didnt really notice that there was a huge line waiting to go in but we didn't really realize it was for our movie theater so we waited and waited when all of a sudden these women were like "um guys did you know there was a line?" and my friend sarah was like "yeah . we know. " and the same woman responded by saying, "oh do you?" THIS WOMAN WAS 45 and she was fighting over a new moon movie! and some other woman who was like 30 said, "well i hope you know theres three of you and theres over a hundred of us in this line." some people are crazy. today i'm staying in. its a homework day, ugh tomorrow's school! :(

finally, one more day till friday and 28 more minutes until vampire diaries is on tv:) hahaha. stacks on deckk, patron on ice:) we can popbottles all nighttt. i love this song when its sung by Anya Marina. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OBlgSz8sSM. this video is actually life for me right now. CHAAAAALIEEEE. the funniest moment of my day today was when i was walking with my friends and rishav was about to throw out a packet of gum.. so he leans into a classroom and throws the packet in there but it misses the trashcan and all of a sudden he looks up and the whole class was looking at him + the teacher. so he sprinted down the hallway. my mommy bought me flowers today and they smell of meadows. it drizzled today, just thinking about it makes me smile.

droplets on my finger tips..

i'll dance under the stars above me.

i am singing for shiraz at the moment. she's talking about stuffed animals and stuff and she thinks i'm listening to her. all i can hear is "look its michael with his hat to cover his curls!" that makes me laugh but shes trying to make me listen to the rest of it and it's not working. today's good 11/18 :) i like the song everybody loves me by one republic. "and the sun is shining everyday but it's far away over the world that's dead." good line. i like the wind when it blows back my hair. i like dark nights when it's nice and cool. i like holding hands. i like when my friends and i run through the streets of new york city while our hair blows back, holding hands on a cool dark night. friday the thirteenth. epic night:) happiness within our fingers. queens of empire states of minds.

props to abdullah hanif for not letting me fail physics & math.

this is my now

this is my today

no more sitting on the side waiting for my chance to play

time to step out, so much to say

i'll never get the chance if i don't break away

write my own symphony, gotta write my own symphony

write my own symphony.

doingmathproblemsiswhack:p .. take out and kit kats

:) lazy day.

went iceskating! finally:) its winter and there's a frozen pond and everthing:D skateskateskate. ahah my two friends marco and sarah went with me and we were actually on crack. not really but we were so so so hyper:P we were running through the streets cuz we were so excited and at one point when we were on the ice, sarah and i were just chilling standing next to the wall when all of a sudden she flipped out and fell on her butt. i stood there and laughed and watched her try to get up and fail over and over again. we went ice skating at bryant park. it was actually amazing. ice skating on a beautiful night in new york city is actually amazing. a few lights brightened up the pitch black sky and the buildings towered over us. "HEY GUYS, DOESNT THAT bUILDING MAKE YOU WANNA SLIDE DOWN IT?" - marco. haha that made our day:) REDVELVETCUPCAKE:)<3

halloween-loved it. rip crayons '09