Oct 11, 2016
Oct 5, 2016
Haven't written in here for a while.
Sometimes I think about it and I can only write in here when things aren't going too well. I realized that I have trouble putting things into words so writing has always been the solution to that. But guess what? Everything has been fine.
The past summer was soul searching. It was getting to know myself front and back. It was getting to know another person in the same way. Never have I had so much information on personalities, on interactions, on conversations, on situations. Everything seems so clear to me. The only thing that isn't clear still is how to express myself. I can analyze, observe, understand. But can I explain? I don't know...
Sometimes I think about it and I can only write in here when things aren't going too well. I realized that I have trouble putting things into words so writing has always been the solution to that. But guess what? Everything has been fine.
The past summer was soul searching. It was getting to know myself front and back. It was getting to know another person in the same way. Never have I had so much information on personalities, on interactions, on conversations, on situations. Everything seems so clear to me. The only thing that isn't clear still is how to express myself. I can analyze, observe, understand. But can I explain? I don't know...
May 12, 2016
Just some thoughts
A human thing that is really mind blowing to me:
We engage in defensiveness so much. But what's really crazy is looking back at an unhealthy point of your life and realizing how much you did to protect its existence. I don't know if that makes sense? But my mom was reminding me a couple days ago how much I used to defend this particular situation that was going on with me. And I realize now that when you are trying to stay sane and healthy, you'll do anything to see something with a more positive/defensive perspective. What else can we really do?
But now I ask myself this: How much of my life do I want to spend defending something that isn't healthy for me? How am I supposed to recognize that I'm in denial?
These are just thoughts...but it's just crazy to me how we can be our own worst enemies. We trick ourselves into thinking things and we're very adamant about blocking out truths.
We engage in defensiveness so much. But what's really crazy is looking back at an unhealthy point of your life and realizing how much you did to protect its existence. I don't know if that makes sense? But my mom was reminding me a couple days ago how much I used to defend this particular situation that was going on with me. And I realize now that when you are trying to stay sane and healthy, you'll do anything to see something with a more positive/defensive perspective. What else can we really do?
But now I ask myself this: How much of my life do I want to spend defending something that isn't healthy for me? How am I supposed to recognize that I'm in denial?
These are just thoughts...but it's just crazy to me how we can be our own worst enemies. We trick ourselves into thinking things and we're very adamant about blocking out truths.
May 8, 2016
Something I never thought I'd find on Mother's Day
A Toast to All the Brave Kids who Broke Up with Their Toxic Moms
But there is time—so much time—after infancy for a mother to become the secure base that a child needs to cope with the world. With each phase of life, from childhood to adolescence to early adulthood, the bad mother gets a new chance at grace. Yet how often can a person endure the type of disappointment inflicted by a bad mother? Susan Griffin writes in the last line of her poem “Bad Mother”: “she drives with all her magic down a different route to darkness.”
Mar 15, 2016
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